• The President Killed His Wife
  • Counterblow
  • Never Bloodless
  • The Atomic Eagle
  • Sigma Division
  • The Kennedy Secret
  • The Gilded Treachery
  • Histats

Funny zingers

Pressed for time? Here are some short zingers for you!

My wife has been missing for two weeks. The police said to prepare for the worst. So, I went to the thrift shop to get all of her clothes back.

I was in bed with a blind girl last night and she said that I had the biggest penis she had ever laid her hands on. I said “You’re pulling my leg.”

I saw a poor old lady fall over today on the ice. At least I presume she was poor – she only had $1.20 in her purse.

My girlfriend thinks that I’m a stalker. Well, she’s not exactly my girlfriend, yet.

Went for my routine checkup today and everything seemed to be going fine until he stuck his index finger up my ass. Do you think I should change dentists?

A wife says to her husband, “you’re always pushing me around and talking behind my back.” He says “What do you expect? You’re in a wheel chair.”

I was explaining to my wife last night that when you die you get reincarnated but must come back as a different creature. She said she would like to come back as a cow. I said, “You’re obviously not listening.”

31meme yawn

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