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Red Bull won’t sponsor me

That’s right, Red Bull will not offer me a sponsorship because my idea of a good time is to sit in front of the TV with some salt & vinegar chips.

On the other hand, this energy drink company is known to sponsor events such as the Red Bull Flugtag where people have to fly in homemade contraptions, the Red Bull Crashed Ice where crazy people state downhill on a narrow track in the middle of a city, and the Red Bull Art of Motion, a free running competition.

This leads me to conclude the following:


NOTE: This post was written while under the influence of the aforementioned beverage.

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3 Responses

  1. Perhaps you should complain that you’ve only been sitting there to let Red Bull give you wings as the adverts say, then claim millions in damages because it hasn’t happened yet. Should keep you in Red Bulls for a while then. Or maybe the advert in the US doesn’t make that claim. Over here I keep expecting people to lift their tee shirts to check and see if there’s any new growth on their backs yet. These days Swift would have written Gullible’s Travels.

    • Good strategy! *searching frantically for a lawyer*

      Gullible’s Travels, ha 🙂 Though I think it already exists; they call it supermarket tabloid now…

  2. […] was also the era of Twilight Zone, and I mean that seriously. People in the 1950s were batshit crazy! Case in […]

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